Rejoice in Your Femininity!

It happened a few years ago. I was in the clothes department when I noticed my reflection in a body mirror hanging next to a rack of blouses. As the image peered back at me, I was astonished how unfeminine I appeared. I was modest and covered, but far from lovely and attractive. Feeling repulsed, it was that moment I realized the reason I did not feel like a lady!

Since that day, I have taken an effort to dress in a feminine way and it has been a fun and rewarding journey. I love being a lady and it is a joy appearing and feeling like one. Through dressing lady-like, it has been a simple reminder to me in this feminist culture that God did create me distinctly to be a woman and I love expressing my femininity by dressing and striving to be one inside and out.

I used to be confused of what being feminine really meant. So many imagines seemed to roll in my mind when I heard the word. Sometimes it was roses, pearls....or lace and bows. Other times it was perhaps anything associated with the color pink.

Because it is easy to have a incorrect view of femininity, society has made it undesirable. Some think that if they are to "feminine" implies that they are to be weak, delicate, or dainty. Others think they must dress like preps with tall high heels, perfectly curled hair, dangling jewels and a perfect manicure. Some get the idea femininity is the girl who's too pretty to go outside, too fragile to have fun, and makes a fuss if she breaks a nail. Of course, all of these views are far from the real thing.

I have come to discover that true femininity is much more than what one wears (even though it indeed is a big part of it!). Through research and from reading the Scriptures, I have realized that true femininity is something in the heart---a heart ultimately surrendered to Christ and His designs for women according to His Word. Because really, a feminist can wear a skirt too.

Biblical femininity is delighting in how God made us as women and is dressing and acting in a way that defines our gender and brings glory to Him. It doesn't mean that a lady cannot drive a truck, ride a horse, or even wear pants. Instead, it is something that starts inside of her and proceeds to her outward appearance and attitude as she realizes and embraces who God created her to be and the distinct role He created her for.

When you rejoice in the way God created you and embrace your femininity, you bring glory to Christ. He created you to be a woman for a reason. Don't try to change it, hide it, or be ashamed of it! Being a woman and being feminine is a wonderful thing and something we should delight in. Expressing our femininity is one way we please the God who created us and show the world that we love Him and are happy to be who He has made us to be. I encourage you to surrender your femininity to Christ and treasure, embrace, and delight in being a woman!

Women Are Like Roses

Did you ever ponder how much a woman is like a rose? There are so many similarities we ladies can learn from this lovely flower.

A lady like a rose...

Should not be picked prematurely.

A man must not attempt to claim her until he is ready and prepared to keep, provide, nurture, lead and water her like a good gardener for the rest of his life. Until he can commit to her completely, he should not ask her to be his. Timing is crucial before such love should begin to bud.

Likewise, the lady should not desire or try to be picked until the time is right. She must mature and grow first. She must use her youth to deepen her roots in the soil of God's Word and to drink the Savior's water for her fulfillment (Jhn. 4:10). Too many girls have missed such an ample opportunity of growth by being picked as only tiny sprouts.

Should not be opened too early.
Whatever stage of her development, a lady should never open her heart to a man except to the one she knows will be her husband. Her hearts is a special abode for only one and to open these blossoms to the wrong man or at the wrong time is losing a precious gift which belongs to one man alone.

Should never be drunk from until the night of her wedding.
To allow a man to drink her nectar who is not her husband is not only a defilment to her roots but is also a sin against her Maker (1 Cor. 6:18). Immorality will cost her her beauty and her fellowship with her God. It will also cost her the most beautiful treasure she owns for her future husband, the one gift she gives away only once to only one person.

As a rose, women are delicate beings, easily torn and easily shattered. Too many have opened their petals at the wrong time and have allowed men to pluck them as they please. They blossom and give everything without matrimony and allow men to drink them dry. Many are being trampled on and left with their beauty, gracefulness, and purity vanished.

Don't give up hope. God is gracious and can restore those whose petals have been torn and plucked to a greater beauty than they could ever know. You'll be blessed and restored when you run to your Maker, who can water you anew again.

No matter where you are, hold on to your treasure. A woman will be blessed when out of obedience to her Maker remains closed for one man and her nectar for only one pair of lips. What a gift it will be to one privileged soul when he picks, opens, and drinks from her at God's appointed timing. What a bond of love shall be between those that choose to wait.

Like a rose, we must grow and find our fulfillment in Christ alone, and if He so desires he will bring a man to claim us one day. Until then, our petals should remain closed for only one.

Longing For Love

While recently spending the day at an amusement park, one thing I couldn't help but notice was how many girls I saw---many who were quite young---hidden in guy's arms. A few faces revealed a look of emptiness and others just plain indifference, but I'm sure each were seeking after the same thing: emotional security and ultimately...love. My heart went out to them.

When I see these young girls I can't help but wonder about their individual world's and their home lives. Do they come from broken families? Are they devoid of love where they live? Are their parents there for them? While this can be related to the choices they make and who they become, despite one's background the truth is that if a girl doesn't have the Lord, guys are one of the only things she can turn to.

I know how they feel. All they want is someone to love and cherish them. As I looked into dark, makeup covered eyes with masculine arms around her waist and showers of kisses upon her neck, I saw the pain and the desire for security. My heart grieved for her because she hasn't found it yet. If you don't know the Lord, where else do you go?

As she places herself in his embraces and lets his hands touch her, she thinks it's love, but the man's actions portray an entirely different message. He loves every minute of easy pleasure from someone who will freely give it. She's vulnerable and he knows it. For her this is the price she must pay for someone to desire and care for her, but how long will it last?

What has happened to respect? Why have girls let go of precious treasures? Where are all the gentlemen?

None of these issues can be solved until God is the center. Christ is the only answer to the emptiness of the soul. No guy could ever fulfill a lady's longings. No lady can find true emotional security and love until she has given her heart to the One who loves her most.

A man and woman who love the Lord can display true love because they have been given it, and until the gospel has been shared, emptiness will have no remedy. It's just another reason the Good News must be spread.

Marriage Perspectives

As young ladies, what should be our perspective on marriage? Should I desire it? Should I prepare for it? Should I be waiting for a husband or put thoughts of marriage aside until later down the road?

It's not a surprising fact that a majority of women are getting married at older ages than ever before. Many women are postponing marriage as long as possible for career pursuits and opportunities to climb the corporate ladder. With the addition of casual hookups there's not a need for matrimony neither a desire for a husband or children. Marriage is just not esteemed or desired as it once was.

Of course God values marriage. He created the institution from the beginning with Adam and Eve. God said that it was not good for man to be alone and because of this the man should leave his father and mother to be one with his wife. Together the husband and wife are a powerful pact to serve God side by side to fulfill His work; They need each other and together can glorify God in wonderful ways.

Understanding this, how should I view and act toward the thought of marriage? As with everything, there's always two extremes. In this case, the feministic frame of mind would be the one side of the pendulum. Me tied down to a husband and children? You say, You've got to be kidding! My career comes first before I settled down. Besides, I'll be married the rest of my life, why not make something of myself? This is an unbiblical perspective and is frequently squabbled because we don't understand God's high calling of being a wife and mother.

You may not be a militant feminist, but the same frame of mind can occur in other ways. I believe it's possible to get so wrapped up in serving the Lord that one can conclude that a husband will only be a distraction in giving to their fullest. While God does call some to live a life of singleness, the majority will be married someday and in their case this position is wrong. It is true that unmarried ladies have a wonderful opportunity to serve God with all their being. 1 Corinthians 7:34 tells us this. We do not have our own family and therefore have much more time and energy to reach out to others. But we must realize that singleness may not last forever and a husband can be a great blessing in serving God. Marriage is a ministry and children can be raised to be warriors for the cause of Christ. We must understand that we do not determine whether we marry. God does.

The second extreme is putting marriage as our highest priority. It's marriage on the mind....all the time. Daydreaming, planning the wedding, fantasying married life, wondering about potential husbands...oh yeah, and great discontentment. Life will be so much happier when I am finally a wife you speculate. Of course this second state of mind is just unhealthy as the first. Marriage is lovely but it's not our chief goal. Glorifying God is.

So what's the answer to this raging pendulum? The solution is balance. We don't want to postpone marriage nor make it our idol. The key is submitting to God's plan and waiting on His timing. If God wants you to serve Him until your 30 before you join your life to a man---then so be it. If He wants you to wed at 20 to start a family early---then so be it. It is not our place to make that decision.

In the meantime our responsibility is to not to impatiently wait or put marriage off as long as we can. We should prepare for marriage without idolizing it; We should be content with our singleness without concluding marriage a hindrance. While waiting on what God has for us, we should be serving Him with our whole hearts. If God sends a young man across our paths one day or if He chooses a life of singleness we will continue serving Him without fail. You see, whether we marry our not, our highest purpose is to serve our Creator. We must keep our focus on Christ while preparing to be a godly woman. That's how we keep balance and put marriage in its proper place. God should be glorified regardless the outcome because He is God and His ways are always best.