Confessions of a Homemaker Wanna-Be

I believe that the occupation of a homemaker and mother are the most significant, fulfilling, special and rewarding jobs a woman could ever have. Ever since I can remember I have desired to one day be a "mom." I've always loved babies and as a young girl I knew that one day I wanted to get married and have several children of my very own. That desire has never left me; In fact, it has only grown over the years.

The example of my own mother and other godly women in my life has inspired me most in these aspirations. My mother is a full-time homemaker and has educated me from start to finish and continues to teach my siblings in their homeschool education. Because of my Mom I have been privileged to witness what motherhood is all about for many years. Mom has used her time, talents and her life to raise and educate her children in the ways of the Lord instead of running after a career or her own ambitions.

I discovered the blessings of children because of my siblings and the manner my Mom treated and spoke about little ones. I remember a time during each of Mom's pregnancy of her gently rubbing her hand over her pot-belly telling me that "the fruit of the womb is His reward" (Ps. 127:3). I knew children were blessings not only because my Mom told us that God said so, but I observed that truth in the lives of my siblings. Each baby that God has brought into our family has been our joy and our delight; Each addition has been our blessing. The more our family grew the more God blessed and the more joy we received. I enjoyed helping Mom with each of her pregnancies and sometimes when I held my sibling as a tiny infant I couldn't help but desire the day I would have my very own.

When I became older I discovered my desires in the light of God's Word. I realized that this was more than just a longing He gave me but something the Lord had made me for! I was made for man (1 Cor. 11:9) to be his helpmeet (Gen. 2:18), to raise children (Ps. 127:3), to train them (Prov. 22:6; Deut. 6:7), and to be guardian of my home (Tit. 2:5; Prov. 31:27).

After entering highschool I began receiving that never ending question from everyone, "What do you want to be when you graduate??" I'd sincerely reply by sharing my true hopes though I knew that the profession of homemaker wasn't very popular in today's culture. Through the years a few people have encouraged me on but a majority have looked at me quite confused. Many are puzzled and ask that surely there's something different/better I'd like to do; some people have become silent after I shared and a few have looked at me like I'm simply crazy.

After receiving the same looks and reactions so many times, I sort of came to a point that I didn't want to reveal to anyone my aspirations even though that desire was still deep within me.

Thankfully God has worked on me about this. Even currently though I know that being a helpmeet, homemaker and a mother is one of the most priceless professions I could ever want or pursue, whenever I receive that dreaded question about my future ambitions I still occasionally stammer around and am afraid to admit my true passion. You know why? Because I realize that most won't understand. And you know what? They generally don't. Being a mother is not an esteemed calling today. We simply have been indoctrinated by our culture and have rebelled against God's created roles.

Another reason I think I "shy away" from telling others my true hopes is because of false assumptions. I want to get married one day and I am not the least sorry, but I guess it's the fear of what others will think when you also add that you want to be a homemaker as your full-time career too. With these combinations many automatically assume that either you're on the hunt for Prince Charming or either you're sitting idly waiting for tall, dark, and handsome to arrive galloping on his horse. After all, you obviously can't become a wife and mother until you have tied the knot!

While it's true that some who wish to be wives are discontent in their state of singleness and are in desperation to finally find "the one," I do not want to be perceived this way because for one I am not. I am trusting in God to meet my future husband in His perfect time and I am quite content being presently unmarried. Please don't get me wrong, I am looking more than forward to the day comes and I meet the man God has for me, but I am utterly happy where I am. I know God still has things He wants to accomplish in my life as an unmarried lady so I am right where I need to be. Sure, there are days I wish the day of matrimony would be approaching more quickly, but I know that God will not keep me single a day longer than it is a part of His plan. He IS GOD, remember? He knows best and has a purpose better than I could ever dream :)

The revelation hit me that whether people understand or not isn't significant. Why on earth should I ever be feel the slightest bit guilty or ashamed of desiring such a sacred calling? If God's Word is clear that this is His idea and I believe this is perhaps a job the Lord would have me fulfill in the future (if it's His will for me to marry), I have no reason to be embarrassed. Ever.

It's easy, however, to feel awkward since it is hard standing alone. It's difficult when people look down on you for aspiring to accomplish something you think God would have you to do. It's tough when it's not the popular path. But then again the whole Christian life is that way. We're called to stand alone and to be separate; The Christian voyage is about being unconformed to the world around us and purposing to live like Christ would have us to. So the truth be told that if I ever marry I want to be a homemaker and a mother and in the meantime I choose not be ashamed of desiring this high calling.

What might God be calling me to accomplish the years while I am unmarried? I'm still praying about this but I know He has a plan. I'm not certain if and what college He may have me attend, what ministries He may allow, what job opportunities He may give, or what doors He may open. I know what He wants me to accomplish in the present but for the future things still look hazy. But this I do know, that whatever God has for me I will follow whether I am to ever marry or not. God's ways are higher than my own and I pray I will follow whole-heartedly. And while I still yet hope that perhaps being a future wife and mother are part of that plan (as it is still my deep desire), it's all up to Him.

With God's grace the next time someone asks me what I would like to do one day I will unashamedly reply that if the Lord wills I'd like to further God's kingdom by being a helpmeet to a godly husband, a keeper of our home, and a mother to many children to raise to be warriors for Christ. I see no other ambitions I'd rather pursue and I will never regret desiring it.